At 16, I started dating a man who was 25 and was in a relationship with him for a year. He thought that I was an adult, but he said that there was no problem at all that I was 16 (although I have a childish appearance and look 14).
At first everything was fine, he gave me gifts and was nice. But then he started touching me more often, and when I was spending the night with him and was planning to just go to bed, while I was sleeping he touched me. I was afraid to react in any way and just lay there, it seemed to me that it lasted forever. I fell asleep and woke up several times and all this time he touched me. When I came home, I wrote to him that this was not normal and that it was sexual harassment, but he said that there was nothing wrong with it and all women say that they were harassed. But in the morning he continued to touch me, although I tried to leave.
He also said that he took drugs, he was not taken into the army because before that he had specially taken drugs. He told me that he was going to resell some drugs and showed them to me. I also find it a little strange that he has a knife collection and always carries a knife everywhere
I just don't know what to do, I'm 17 and I'm Ukrainian, and he's a 26 year old man with Swiss citizenship. We started communicating less, but I don’t want to leave it like that. But at the same time I'm afraid that I'll have problems because I wrote a statement to the police and I don't want my parents to know. Besides, at the beginning of the "relationship" I was already 16, not 15.
Hello,
Thank you for trusting us enough to share your experience with this man.
The fact that this man was nice to you at first and gave you gifts is no reason to ignore your boundaries. You were able to tell him that his behaviour was not okay and that you felt sexually harassed. The information you have shared with us is worrying: the fact that he minimises his behaviour, has lied to you, uses drugs and has a collection of knives.
Is there anyone you trust in your circle of friends or family who you could talk to about what happened with this man? Perhaps someone at school? A psychologist or school nurse?
We would also like to let you know that regardless of your background or residence status, you have rights and help is available.
In the canton of Zug, you can contact a victim support centre. It is free and confidential. Specialists will be able to meet with you, listen to you in a supportive manner, inform you of your rights and assist you with any steps you wish to take. You can call them on 041 725 26 50.
Also, if he threatens you or becomes violent again, do not hesitate to call the police on 117.
We strongly encourage you to talk to an adult you trust about what happened with this man. The specialists at the victim support centre are there for you and are used to dealing with people in situations similar to yours. Our door is always open if you would like to give us an update on your situation. We are sending you our best wishes.
Hello, Thank you for trusting us enough to share your experience with this man. The fact that this man was...
Bonjour, Vous avez pris contact avec nous car vous avez croisé à deux reprises dans la rue un jeune couple...
Bonjour, Depuis que votre compagnon a officialisé son divorce avec son ex-femme vous vous sentez persécutée et harcelée par cette...